It’s His Fight.
Reading Time: 7 minutes
“The Lord gives his own reward for doing good and being loyal, and I refused to kill you even when the Lord placed you in my power, for you are the Lord's anointed one.”
1 Samuel 26:23
At 1:50am, a friend texted me one of the most inspiring and jaw dropping concepts ever. They sent me a screenshot of notes from their personal time with God entitled “Am I ok with God loving my enemies?”. The story of Jonah chronicles a man who ran miles across the ocean to avoid sharing a message of love with those who had hurt him and his people. We laugh at the lengths people like him went to keep love from reaching others, but if we're honest, we are often in the same boat (no pun intended). We want revenge for what people have done to us. We want them to feel the pain they caused us and others. But what do we do when God doesn't seem to punish our enemies in the ways we would like? Better yet, are we trusting God's process enough to not intervene and get revenge on our own, but to let God handle it?
The story of David found in the first book of Samuel is riddled with all kinds of betrayal, conflict, and abuse, yet David is an amazing example of forgiveness and allowing God to control a situation. Off rip, Saul is jealous of David. David is more successful, has the favor of the press, and Saul knows David is next in line for his job. Saul tries to kill David at least four times in the first three chapters of their meeting. David flees and is on the run for a good portion of his life because of this. He has to watch his back at every turn because spies and hit men are searching for him on the king's behalf. David does nothing wrong to disrespect or endanger Saul yet Saul is adamant about destroying David. Saul has caused so much harm that it would make sense for David to retaliate and kill Saul. It’s crazy cause David and David’s men actually have multiple opportunities to do just that. At one point, David’s men are hiding in a cave when Saul comes to use the restroom. David's men cheer as they tell David his opportunity has presented itself, but as David begins to move forward, he hesitates and decides not to kill Saul, saying, “I shouldn't attack the Lord's anointed one, for the Lord Himself has chosen him.” Then, David reveals to Saul what could have happened and Saul admits that he has done evil and David has replayed him with good. They go their separate ways and it seems like Saul is regretful for his actions, but not even two chapters later Saul is back at it trying to kill David! Saul hears where David is at and sends 3,000 of his best men to go hunt him down.
David hears that Saul is after him again and starts making his way to meet him. David catches up with Saul as Saul's camp is sleeping and David asks some of his best men to go into the camp with him. David's guy Abishai agreed and they sneak into the camp. They see Saul sleeping with his spear by his head. Abishai, a trained warrior, whispers to David and says that he can kill a saul with one shot. He doesn't even have to try twice. And David says no! Y’all this is actually in the Bible! Read 1st Samuel 26! David has hired assassins in his crew, eager to handle this lightwork and he is calling them off? Why? Same answer as before. David's response is in 1st Samuel 26:9-11:
“No!” David said. “Don’t kill him. For who can remain innocent after attacking the Lord’s anointed one? Surely the Lord will strike Saul down someday, or he will die of old age or in battle. The Lord forbid that I should kill the one he has anointed! But take his spear and that jug of water beside his head, and then let’s get out of here!”
David out here playing pranks when this guy deserves to die. David and Abishai run to the top of a hill and yell down to the camp. They taunt Saul’s head of security saying he and his men deserve to die for what they have been doing. And they show Saul's spear and water jug for proof that they could have once again killed Saul but didn't.
Saul recognizes David’s voice and says something interesting. Saul says, “Is that you my son?” And David replies, “Yes, my lord, the king.” Interesting titles considering their histories. David explains the crimes Saul has committed against him and shares the hurt he has experienced from the hand of Saul and his men. He questions what he did to deserve such a terrible relationship with someone he should’ve been able to trust. Saul hears him and confesses that he has sinned, and vows to no longer try to harm David. Saul admits how wrong he has been and asks David to come back home.
David has been abused. No one can argue he hasn’t. David deserves to be seen and should not be expected to do this work of reconciliation for a grown man who was supposed to protect and mentor him. Yet David does a couple things I believe we can learn from as we navigate abusive relationships.
David builds a community. David has a band of other outcasts and hurt men that he can rely on for support. He doesn't try to deal with this pain alone.
David allows himself to be heard. David doesn’t hold back in being real and honest about the things he felt and experienced. David doesn't gaslight himself or act like Saul isn't in the wrong for what he has been doing. David's pain is real.
David sets boundaries. He doesn't feel forced to go back “home” with his abuser. The Bible says they went their separate ways, twice. David even asks Saul to send one of his servants to get his stuff instead of coming personally and that's ok.
But the biggest thing I see in this story is that David remembers that this is God's problem to fix and not his. Every time David has a chance to get revenge on Saul, he states that he will not kill the Lord's Anointed. David doesn't try to step in and kill Saul off himself. It may seem crude, but David knows that God hits harder than him. The word anointed just means chosen or marked. Every time David had a chance to kill Saul for himself, he reminded himself that God had already put his name on this battle. God had already signed up for this challenge and, in trusting God, David did not allow the weight of trying to fix everything to weigh him down. God already had his sights on David's battle. As a slingshot warrior, David might have understood this from the perspective of a long distance soldier. Ground troops may want to close in on a battle while a sniper with a better view of the field tells them to hold off because they have already locked on to the target. God had already locked in to this battle and it was only a matter of time until he accomplished more than David could've ever done. David handled what he could control and allowed God to handle the rest.
At the core of Christian life is trusting God's process. It may seem slow or even like it's moving backwards, but God will have the final say. In Exodus, God reminds us that He hears the cries of His people and sends a savior to liberate them. You are seen. You're not alone. You are not forgotten. You may wonder why those who have done you dirty are still thriving, but God will win out. Don’t hold on to the weight you were never meant to carry. God wants to fight these battles and enact justice. That’s his job to figure out. Not yours. Forgiveness isn't always forgetting, but it is letting go. You can only handle what you can handle. God will handle justice. You cannot change them. You can only choose how you react.
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