What To Do With Fear
Read Time: 7 mins
O God, have mercy on me, for people are hounding me. My foes attack me all day long. I am constantly hounded by those who slander me, and many are boldly attacking me. But when I am afraid, I will put my trust in you. I praise God for what he has promised. I trust in God, so why should I be afraid? What can mere mortals do to me?
Psalms 56:1-4 NLT
Music has always played an important role in my life. I could tell you so many formational stories. When I was a baby, my parents would tell babysitters to play Hezekiah Walker's 1998 live album and I would stop crying and be well-behaved for the hour and three-minute duration of that album. I remember singing along to the Phil Collins’ Tarzan soundtrack with my dad every day on the way to preschool. The first time I remember desiring God was at a Tye Tribbett concert. The first purchase I made with my own money was a Walkman CD player and the soundtrack for Disney’s Jump In. Songs have a way of marking moments, reinforcing beliefs, and soothing the soul. Songs impact us to our core. Last night I was reminded of one of the most influential songs in my young life.
I remember my mom playing Steve Green’s “Hide ‘em in Your Heart” children’s album from a small boombox nuzzled against the wall in the Lincoln, Nebraska bedroom room I shared with my brother, Pax. The song that stuck out was “When I Am Afraid.” I didn’t realize at the time but every song on the album was taken directly from scripture and this song was based on Psalm 56:3-4.
The lyrics were simple, “When I am afraid I will trust in you, trust in you, trust in you. When I am afraid I will trust in you, in God whose word I praise.” My mom would play this or sing it with us when we were afraid of storms or any other situation as young kids and it stuck. I only actually found the album a few years ago but the song and its message were prominent in my memory for the last two decades. I’ve even found myself singing this song to myself all the way throughout the difficult times of college and early adulthood.
Maybe God was intentional in leading my mom to make sure this verse was in my heart because He knew what I would struggle with. I’ve told you before that I often struggle with a paralyzing fear. I’ve procrastinated for days because I was afraid to send an email or have a conversation. I’ve failed classes because I was afraid to ask questions. I’ve held back on implementing the gifts and ideas God has implanted inside of me because I’m afraid of how others may respond or what unknown fights may come as a result of my actions. I’ve employed poor communication because I was afraid people wouldn't understand. Do you see how stupid that sounds? I’ve held back on pursuing what is best because I was paralyzed by potential rejection and abandonment. It’s been so bad that sophomore year in college, a professor called me into their office, acknowledged the fear they had seen in me, and offered to pay out of their own pocket for me to go to therapy.
Now some of you are shocked. It’s funny because I've had friends tell me that others have made comments like “I want to be as bold and fearless as Pace” and they just laugh because they know a deeper side of me. I talked to an elder at my church about a task I was afraid of and they stepped back and exclaimed how they never thought they would hear this from me. I feel honored and affirmed by the vote of confidence people have in me. I would love to brag about how bold and faith-filled I am but it wouldn't be the full story. I’m often a procrastinating, paralyzed scaredy cat. If only you knew how many nights I've spent crying on the floor while being crushed by an overwhelmed imagination. Myself and few others know that it's not all faith and confidence over here.
Now I'm not all fear either. There is truly a paradox at play in my life. I truly believe that God has given me a gift of faith and confidence. I love to live in a space of unapologetic boldness and belief and God has blessed me in that arena. However, I believe that those with the most faith may also be susceptible to the most fear.
We see this in David. You'd imagine the guy who had the faith to tell a prized fighter that he would cut off his head before he even had a sword wouldn't struggle with fear. The guy who storms into a king's quarters and proudly recounts the victories he's had over bears must surely not deal with the same debilitating fear many of us deal with. Yet this is the David who throughout the Psalms doesn't hide the true weight of his emotions. He doesn't avoid or sugarcoat his struggle with worry and fear. This is a place that I believe many who are called to great acts of faith find tension in. Many of us wrestle with powerful faith and powerful fear simultaneously.
What do I mean? It's not just that the devil is trying to slow you down by attacking your gift of faith with fear. That is a true attack. The devil is purposely trying to slow down those that God has gifted to run ahead. But I believe there may be a deeper connection. I believe that faith and fear have a special relationship. The same strength of vision and belief that makes faith possible is what makes fear possible. The stronger your faith, the greater the potential stakes and challenge of fear. And the greater the fear, the more potential for radical faith.
Faith and fear are powered by the same traits. Faith and fear both ask the same question: “What If?” Faith is believing in a possibility and responding to that belief. Fear is believing in a possibility and responding to that belief. Faith is acting like something that isn't yet, already is. Fear is acting like something that isn't yet, already is. Faith and fear are the exact same thing built on different premises. Faith leans in belief towards progress and fear leans in belief toward punishment. Faith leans on what God can do, and fear leans on what you cannot do. They exercise the same muscle in different directions.
I know I'm talking to visionaries. Whether we feel more fearful or faithful at this moment, we all are blessed with the same God-given gift of vision. While you may lean closer to faith in some areas and fear in others, at the core, you are a visionary. That’s what makes this paradox possible. Visionaries are like point guards or quarterbacks, they see every option before the play unfolds. Those who are blessed with the gift of seeing the possibilities are also cursed with the weight of seeing the possibilities. Those who see the greater that could happen also see the challenges that could happen. But like any trait God has given, this gift of vision must be trained.
The way we build our faith and limit our fear is by training the direction we think in. It’s all about shifting our perspective. As a visionary, you will see possibilities. That's a given. However the faithful seek out the potential opportunity while the fearful focus on the potential opposition. It's all about perspective. I talked to a friend who deals with this same paradox of vision and they said something that stuck, “The fear of falling is really an invitation to fly.” Our scariest moments are really an invitation to the greatest leaps of faith. That is one reason those who God trusts with the biggest miracles often work through the biggest weaknesses. Faith’s potential is made greater in times of opposition but you will only see that if you train yourself to look for the opportunity. When Lazarus died, Mary and Martha saw the opposition of death but Jesus saw the opportunity of resurrection. When thousands were hungry, the disciples saw a problem but Jesus saw possibilities. When the storm came, the disciples saw the potential for drowning, but Peter saw the opportunity to tread on what was terrifying them. The bigger the storm, sickness, poverty, trauma, abuse, or opposition, the bigger the potential for a miracle. It's all about looking for opportunity and not self-preservation.
This is why David doesn't run from fear, he reacts to it. When he is afraid, he simply shifts his position. Let me paint it like this… Have you ever been on or seen a safari? I remember going on one while at Disney World. Now, I would never feel comfortable walking that close to powerful and unpredictable animals by myself and in my own power. I would be no match to their reactionary decision to attack me if it came to that. However, on a safarri, you are often driving through the otherwise dangerous habitat in an equipt and armored truck with trained and capable personnel supervising. Notice the difference in mindset when you are safe inside of something bigger than what you are afraid of? This is the difference between putting your faith in Jesus vs relying on your own strength and succumbing to fear. Putting your trust in God is putting yourself in an armored truck. When you're safe in the arms of Jesus, you don't worry about what would have killed you if it caught you alone. David doesn't ignore the reasons for his fear, he is being attacked and persecuted. However, when he puts his faith in Jesus and shifts to God’s strength and not his own, he can find peace and refuge in the storm.
Fear is honestly one of the most arrogant, self-centered, and prideful acts you can engage in. Fear is assuming the buck stopped with you. It's assuming you are the one protecting and providing for yourself. Fear is the fruit of self-aggrandizement. Who told you that you were in charge of protecting yourself, let alone capable of doing it?
Fear sees potential and assumes the power is in your hands but faith sees potential and assumes the power is in God’s. Do you see the difference in premise? This is why I love this Psalm. Not only does the visionary, bold, courageous, confident, warrior-king named David admit that he struggles with fear, but he lets us in on his response to it. He says when fear knocks on the door, I let Jesus answer it.
David is humble enough to have confidence in Jesus. He says that when he is afraid, he puts his trust in something bigger and better than him. Fear is fighting on your own while faith is putting your money on the undefeated champ. Fear is like walking through a lion safari by yourself but faith is like strolling through in an armored truck. You won't be afraid of lion attacks when you are protected by something stronger than them and not limited by your own ability. This is why David can say, “What can mere mortals do to me?” When I am hiding in Christ, human issues and human conflicts are no longer qualified to play in my league. Regular problems are below you because they're below Him. The way of faith is allowing God to take you above the noise of human challenge. You don't have to be afraid of opinions, rejection, displacement, persecution, delays, dismays, or any trial or tribulation when you are hidden in Christ. The issues of this world don't concern you because they don't concern Him and you are in Him.
When I am afraid, I will trust in you. I’ll humble myself enough to see problems through your strength and not mine. I'll be humble enough to remember that the buck doesn't stop with me. I'll turn my vision towards what is possible with You and not what is probable with me.
You have vision, that's a good thing. Change your orientation to Jesus and your gift of belief will begin to work with you instead of against you. Ask yourself what you're really afraid of. Dive deep into what makes you uncomfortable. Then ask yourself what God would say about it. Did Jesus have any reason to be afraid of rejection? Then neither do you. Did Jesus have a reason to be afraid of fights, failure, or the future? Neither do you. Did Jesus have a reason to be afraid of not being sufficient? Neither do you. Did Jesus have a reason to be afraid of their opinions and jokes? You get the picture now, right? I’m in Christ, and if He is the one covering me, I only fear being affected by what can affect Him. When I am afraid, I will hide in him. When I am afraid, I will rely on Him. When I am afraid, I will put my trust in Him.
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There is something that constantly tempts me to rest in fear. That thing is ROAR. I'm telling you, every year God proves it’s Him and not us running the show. One way you can help support is by donating to the Cincinnati efforts of this ministry so that we can bring the event back to my church, Shiloh.
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