Who are you?
So I was reading 1st Corinthians for worship today. I came across 1st Corinthians 13:4-7 which says,
“4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
This verse reminded me of something I saw on Twitter about how when wondering if someone is the right one for you in a romantic relationship, a cool exercise to do is to replace their name with the word “love” in this passage. I really like this idea because if someone doesn’t fit or isn't striving to fit these characteristics of love, I can't logically see myself having a happy life with them.
Imagine someone who is always complaining about how long stuff takes, or someone who isn't kind.. or someone who loves watching others fail, or someone who is always talking about themself? That sounds like a terrible person to be with right? Not pursuing a romantic relationship with someone who isn't kind seems like common sense (well it isn't for some of us but that's another story), but a lot of times we forget that a relationship involves us too. We are so quick to determine what we require in a relationship instead of looking within and making sure we have something to bring to the table ourselves.
A lot of times we look to what others should be doing or how others should be growing instead of being introspective and checking for our own growth.
God impressed me to read the verse and put my name in the place of love and honestly, Pace isn't always as kind as he could be, Pace can be prideful, Pace can envy. Pace doesn't always equal love as much as I'd want to. Thinking of the verse in this way kinda made me feel bad to keep it a buck with you, but like everyone, I’m a work in progress. And looking back, I can see how far I have come. Someone once said that the most important project you will be tasked with in life is the betterment of yourself. This is the hardest project you will ever be faced with and you will really never finish it.
I think we often attribute our problems in platonic, romantic, and professional relationships and interactions to the other party when in reality it takes two to tango. Sometimes we are the problem and we need to be mature enough to say that and move forward. We need to realize our need for growth and maturation in some areas.
We need to work on ourselves more. I think a lot of times we expect things from other people that we don't give ourselves.
In Luke 6:41-42, Jesus says, “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 42 How can you say to your brother, ‘Brother, let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when you yourself fail to see the plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.
So often we think of goals for others and not our own wellbeing and development. Allow God to come into your heart and transform you. Allow God to rearrange broken parts and fill empty places. He may use therapy. He may use tough conversations. He may use hurdles on the journey but I promise growth is beautiful. Let God grow you.
Not only do we need to realize our need for a savior, but we also need to realize that that savior isn't us. We need growth. We need to be transformed into a representation of love so we can be better versions of ourselves. But we can't produce that growth on our own. I'm sorry. Self-help books are great, therapy is great, discipline is great, but they are all tools the creator uses to build His creations. We have to make sure those tools are surrendered into the right hands. We have to stop looking at our need for growth and thinking there is something we can accomplish that will heal the heart problems within us. We can not build without a blueprint. Self-growth without God is like a road trip without knowing where you're going. Allow God to be the one to transform you.
I started writing about this in March of 2018 (it’s March 2021 now) and wow I have grown a lot. I’m not perfect. I still need to grow as a man and friend. But looking back and seeing how far I’ve come is exciting. God will complete this work in you. He is building. He is molding.
And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns. Philippians 1:6
1. You are in need of growth and maturation.
2. Jesus is the only one who can accomplish this holistic transformation within you.
Keep growing. Allow God to grow you into the best version of yourself. He is working and He WILL FINISH! Let Him chisel. Let Him cut out the things that don't look like Him. Let Him transform you into a better representation of what love should look like. Open up and let Him in. Jesus is a carpenter by trade, so what do you think He'll do when you let Him in your heart..? My guess is that He will build.
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